The Riddles of the Past, Present, and Future
by Windrises
Summary: In order to find out what the Riddler's planning in the future Batman thinks about his past and present.


Note: Batman was created by Bill Finger and Bob Kane and is owned by DC Comics.

Batman was driving around in the Batmobile while struggling to find out where the Riddler was. The Riddler had given Batman a riddle: What do the past, present, and future have in common with me? Batman said, "In order to find out what the Riddler's going to do in the future I have to remember what he was like in the past."

Flashback from the Riddler's start as a criminal: Bruce Wayne saw the Bat Signal so he quickly got on his Batman costume and went to the rooftop of Commissioner Gordon's workplace. Batman asked, "What's going on?"

Commissioner Gordon stated, "A former detective named Edward Nygma is a new villain called the Riddler."

Batman asked, "What did he steal?"

Commissioner Gordon replied, "We don't know, but he gave us a riddle that apparently has the answer."

Batman grabbed the riddle paper. After searching for the answer on the internet Batman realized that the Riddler was robbing a bank that was a mile away. He started driving to the bank.

The Riddler finished packing the money in his car. He started driving away, but he saw the Batmobile and said, "That weirdly dressed fool solved my riddle. He's smart for a super hero." The Riddler started driving over the speed limit to try to escape Batman, but Batman caught up to him.

Batman said, "You better give up clue boy. I'm going to have you locked up for years."

The Riddler replied, "It's just a small robbery."

Batman said, "No it's not you riddle lover. I did some research on the recent bank robberies in Gotham. A majority of them have riddles attached to the empty bank vaults."

The Riddler replied, "It's about time that somebody noticed that obvious pattern. It's hard to believe the police were too gullible to pick on my hints."

Batman said, "The police in Gotham have a habit of doing nothing of help." Batman jumped on top of the Riddler's car. The Riddler accidentally drove his car into a pile of garbage cans. Batman fell to the ground, but he didn't get hurt.

The Riddler got out of the car, grabbed the bags of money, and tried to run away. Batman managed to grab the Riddler and punch him. The Riddler said "You're pretty harsh Batman. I think that I deserve to be treated like a gentleman."

Batman replied, "You deserve to live in Arkham Asylum. What's your big plan Eddie?"

The Riddler said, "I have another riddle for you Batman. How am I involved in this crime, but not involved overall?" Batman got out his cell phone to research the answer to the riddle. The Riddler grabbed Batman's cell phone and smashed it. The Riddler said, "You're not playing my game fairly Batman. If you want the answer you'll have to think about it. Unlike Commissioner Gordon you're smart so think of the answer."

Batman thought about the riddle and said, "I've figured out the answer. You're clearly involved in the crime. However you're not involved overall, because you're being bossed around by a different villain."

The Riddler replied, "I don't like to admit it, but I'm not the real mastermind of the recent crimes in Gotham. I have a very evil and dangerous boss."

Batman asked, "Who's the boss?"

The Riddler replied, "I have another riddle for you." Batman rolled his eyes. The Riddler said, "Who seems innocent yet worked with criminals and is named after a clown?" The Riddler set a empty newspaper stand on fire to distract Batman while he escaped with the money.

The Riddler went to Black Mask's hideout. Black Mask asked, "Did you steal the money?"

The Riddler said, "Yes, but I had to deal with Batman."

Black Mask replied, "I can't stand that winged fool. He's the knight of problems. Did you tell him who I am?"

The Riddler said, "Well he knows that I have a boss." Black Mask was about to choke the Riddler, but the Riddler said, "I tricked him."

Black Mask asked, "What do you mean riddle boy?"

The Riddler said, "I gave him a riddle that made him think that Harleen Quinzel is my boss so you won't get any blame for what happened."

Black Mask replied, "It seems like your silly habit of giving riddles to the good guys helped my master plan."

The Riddler asked, "Do you want me to keep robbing banks in Gotham boss?"

Black Mask said, "No. We need to stop robbing small stuff. I want rich people to be robbed like crazy. I want all of their money!"

After thinking about the Riddler's past Batman said, "I have to think about the Riddler's present. I need to think about one of his most recent schemes."

Flashback: The Riddler walked into his classroom. The Riddler said, "Greetings kids. Your homework assignment was to steal at least twenty dollars. Hand over the money kids."

Liam said, "I stole forty dollars Mr. Nygma."

The Riddler replied, "Then my proudness for you doubled." The Riddler got excited and grabbed the money.

Tara said, "I stole one hundred dollars."

The Riddler replied, "Then it sounds like you might earn the honor of being the teacher's pet."

Mel said, "I thought that two bills equaled twenty dollars so I stole these one dollar bills."

The Riddler replied, "That's only two dollars. I'm ashamed of you. You need to learn some proper counting skills."

Emily said, "I tried to steal twenty dollars, but I felt too guilty to do it."

The Riddler replied, "Well you should be guilty that you failed your mission. You're getting a very low score for this." The Riddler looked around the classroom and noticed that most of the students were gone. He asked, "Where are the other kids?"

Emily said "I don't know."

The Riddler thought about it and said, "It seems like Batman has found out what I'm up to. He probably caught the other students and is going to have their parents teach them some boring morals. You four remaining students need to be more careful and you're going to have to steal more money from now on. Your homework assignment for today is to steal one thousand dollars."

Liam replied, "That seems like too much money to steal."

Tara said, "It'll be hard to not get caught if we took that much."

The Riddler replied, "Get me the money or I'll tattle tale to your parents about you skipping your real school. If you don't get me the money you'll fail the class and get years of detention."

Batman drove to the Riddler's classroom. Batman knocked on the door. The Riddler assumed it was a kid that was going to give him money so he opened the door. The Riddler said, "You're not a kid Batman."

Batman replied, "Well that's a true fact. I have some questions for you."

The Riddler said, "Feel free to ask me a question now Batman."

Batman asked, "Why did you start a classroom for kids who want to skip real school?"

The Riddler said, "These kids failed at school so I'm tricking them into getting money for me. I'm teaching kids that if you want something in life steal it instead of working for it."

Batman responded, "That's a very messed up lesson Riddler."

The Riddler said, "I'm a teacher now so please call me Mr. Nygma."

Batman replied, "I'm going to call you Mr. Long Prison Sentence after I arrest you."

The Riddler asked, "Why work to get the stuff you want? Stealing seems much easier."

Batman responded, "But the rewarding feeling of working hard to get what you want is much better. The kids need to learn and work hard. They need to get to their goals by following justice."

The Riddler said, "Justice is a waste of time Batman. My students seem to agree with me on that."

Batman replied, "Well you've taught kids about how to betray their teacher. I found out where your hideout is from one of your former students."

The Riddler said, "I thought you would be smart enough to find this classroom by yourself."

Batman replied, "You didn't give me any riddles this time."

The Riddler smiled and said, "I tricked you really hard this time Batman. I avoided giving you any riddles this time, because I knew that you be expecting them. I tricked you by breaking my pattern." The Riddler laughed.

Batman said, "You may be as clever as I am, but your physical strength isn't that great. I think that I can win this battle."

The Riddler replied, "Actually I'm going to win this battle Batman."

Batman grabbed the Riddler and punched him. Batman said, "You should give up very soon you awful teacher."

The Riddler replied, "I'm going to win the award for best evil teacher." The Riddler kicked Batman and laughed.

Batman said, "Justice seems to be something that you ignore."

The Riddler replied, "It's too hard to ignore it, because of you." The Riddler tried to punch Batman, but Batman kicked the Riddler. The Riddler said, "When I was a student I wanted to jump on the desk. I'm going to do it now." The Riddler jumped off of a desk and crash landed to the ground. He passed out.

Batman said, "Jumping off desks is a incredibly dangerous thing to do. Even adult criminals need to learn that lesson."

Batman thought about it and said, "In the past he was a smart criminal, he's recently been a foolish criminal, and he's going to become a pathetic criminal." Batman drove to a nearby store that sold toys, puzzles, and riddle books. Batman went into the store and quickly saw the Riddler. The Riddler was on the floor so Batman ran up to him and asked, "What's going on?"

The store owner said, "The Riddler broke in here so the guards started fighting him. I thought that I would have to call the police, but the guards were able to stop him. Frankly I was him to be a bigger threat."

The Riddler got up and asked, "How did you find out my riddle Batman?"

Batman said, "I realized your pattern."

The Riddler was barely awake so he asked, "What?"

Batman said, "You started off as a major criminal, but as the years have gone you keep getting closer to being a fool."

The Riddler thought about what Batman told him and said, "Oh my. I've been so obsessed with outsmarting you that I've been making myself dumber without realizing it. Well that means that I outsmarted myself and there's nobody smarter than me which means I won." The Riddler laughed while doing a victory dance.

Batman put handcuffs on the Riddler and said, "You outsmarted yourself, but you didn't outsmart me which means I'm the winner again." Batman looked at the Riddler with a smug smile on his face.

The Riddler angrily replied, "I'm going to outsmart you Batman. I'll come up with the greatest riddle of all time."

Batman said, "I have a riddle for you: What do you and a car that has no gasoline have in common?"

The Riddler thought about it and replied, "I'm pretty tired so give me the answer already."

Batman smiled and said, "Both you and the car stay the same, never getting better. You'll never outsmart me and that car will never go anywhere."

The Riddler shook his fist at Batman and said, "When I break out of Arkham Asylum I'm going to fill up my brain with gallons of evil riddles." The Riddler did an evil laugh.


End file.
